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| Bad news kids. Libraries and schools don't like blogs and block them. Even worse news they are my only access to the internet at the moment. Worst news. Therefore there won't be any blogs unless I get a teaching job and can afford a laptop or one randomly shows up at my door. You can always e-mail me. | | |
| So my pastor made a really good point I needed to hear today. The basic premise of the message was we live life moving foward, but don't understand it until we look back. Which I've heard this before and found it to be a bit cliched, but in light of what God's been doing lately it makes a lot of sense. The other point that he made is in relation to God sometimes we won't understand until we get to heaven, but the amazing thing is that God is so good and loves us so much that he's not going to ask us to do something that he can't get us through. As I'm typing that I say to myself, "Hmmmmm that's a really interesting thought Indiesupergirl." I've come to realize I don't often process things very well until they're outside my head. Anywho back to the point. Even though we don't understand how God's going to work it out, if he asks us to do it, HE WILL WORK IT OUT. God is that wonderful, good, amazing, and faithful! | | |
| Wow, so I chanced to ask what real Biblical love looks like and God seems to have taken the question quite seriously. He's slowly, but surely teaching me some stretching but wonderful things. The slow part is on my half not his. The first thing he's showing me is that it is in no way shape or form about me. It's easy to say that of course, but much easier to say than execute. But God is so faithful and he shows up just when you need him to get through the tough parts. I have just felt so privelaged to be his child lately. I am completely awed by the relationship he is happy to have with us despite him being God and all. | | |
| It really has been too long, but not being able to blog at school or the library has really been cramping my style on the old xanga. I've just experienced so much of God's goodness lately. I feel like for the first time in my life I have come to understand what that VBS song says about the peace that passes all understanding down in my heart. Though the last few months have not been just peaches and cream, when the crap happens there is this overwhelming feeling that I'm going to be OK and God's got me right where he wants me regardless. He keeps walking with me step by step and he just continues to tell me he loves me so much! So much more than I can handle sometimes, but so constant, so unchanging. | | |
| If you haven't read my last entry it contains necessary information for this entry so check it out before proceeding so as not to be confused. Since that last heartwarming experience I have been seriously reexamining how I love people. Well I've been toying with it for awhile, but the issue was brought to the surface again. I realize that I can convince myself that I am this amazingly loving person when everyone is saying and doing what I want them to do, but what about when they don't? How do I love them then. Though I cracked jokes about it and whipped out the ever faithful defense of sarcasm I have relied so heavily on my entire life the fact of the matter is what this person said really hurt. Then I had to ask how is it that someone I talk to every few months has the ability to hurt me so much? Is it the history? Is it me deluding myself into thinking our friendship is deeper than it is? But more importantly how do I continue to show love to this person, when I still feel very hurt and degraded? It is the old conflict between knowing I am entitled to nothing and yet exsiting in a culture that has since birth taught me I am entitled to a great many things. What does the love of God look like in this situation?
Beloved, let us love one another. For love is of God and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. He that loves not, knows not God, for God is love. Beloved, let us love one another. 1 John 4:7-8 | | |
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